And then, after all the mess comes peace and quiet…

Or at least I hope so when the mess starts.

Because, to be honest, well, it is mostly messy all the time…

… problems all around even if you try to be so obsessively careful as I am… because I do try to be careful, to not do anything what could make me closer to some dangerous zones I could truly not handle…

Yeah, I truly try… not to mess up.

I got so kicked by life that… well, I am still aching, sooo, I try not to put my hands into everything.

I try.

I fail.

I fail often, but for sure not so often as I could… maybe I am not so adventurous… as I used to be, or maybe for some people I am…

To be honest, I so do not care… about adventures, looking for them.

They always fin me.

Always.

This is why I often prefer to hide… to just breath, to just overthink everything, be creative but also try to be safe. And then… I usually jump, and change everything in my life. Everything… or just a huge part…

Why?

Why I do it to myself?

And then…