I am drained.

Empty.

Somehow… I got all my plans, all paintings scheduled for later, all ideas cataloged. I got things to do, but I feel so drained. Tired… not ready to do anything important, not caring… Maybe it is spring, or maybe it is only one crazy always scared, depressed, weird me? I got no idea, all I know… my hands need to work, but with me so shaking and not wanting anything, dreaming, but in fact only for dreams, not for things… I mean really, what is wrong with me! People go to shops and have fun, why I can not have things? Why I do not kike… having, own, possess.

I feel drained… not of ideas, but of wants…