I paint…

Of course I still paint, but…

I began to feel so uncertain with it, somehow shy, somehow… I do not want to show it off to anyone, I do not want any criticism…

And then I look at this the most expensive painting, which is just a square… on canvas and I rethink myself, and then again, I feel not good. Not even worthy. I feel unnecessary… I feel bad… or maybe just me…

Still, this is our new piece for a new home.

It is called “The Path”, and of course it changes depending on light or the corner you look at this, from…

It dances, speaks…

And I am still embarrassed showing it.

After all these years of learning… years of painting…

I am still… or just again?

I am not in a good place, not at all.

And nothing people say can change it. Truly. I do not think my art is crucial, or at least necessary to this world.

But for me?

Maybe it is only about me?

Maybe I need my art, and not another piece from China, which they stole from one of the artists? Printed on a cheap paper… Yeah, they do it. Or another picture of a fucking cheese plant leaf which is so freaking popular now. In gold of course… because… To be honest, come on, you all will buy something what others have than something unique only because it shows off the price…

You are so sad people… have you ever seen a happiness in the eyes of an older man which you pay and praise for art he created which you take home. And you are one and only to have it! A piece of someones soul…

Have you?

I had… and I will do it again.

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