I wanna try…

I want to try so many things!!!

All those amazing scented candles available only abroad… and advent calendars with crazy stuff inside like LEGO, make up or tea… oh yes, tea could be fun. I never had a regular advent calendar, only those very cheap with nasty chocolate inside. I do not like them. They are weird. Who eats a piece of chocolate every morning? If I am in need, I eat a whole bar and it is done, so…

Yeah…

I have done so many things you probably never did. I know how to kill and prepare a chicken. Yeah, nasty stuff but I can do it in a cold and hot way. I smells awful that way, but still… I can do it. I saw eggs inside of a chicken. Still with a soft cover. I can create a trench, and properly clean it up.

Obsessively.

I can do weird things.

Put my legs, while sitting behind my neck. Yeah. I can cook amazing chicken soup, not that I love eating it, but I can do it. I can hate food and obsessively want it, I can throw up everything perfectly… I can also care too much. I always care too much. I can also run away, I can…

But there is still so may things I wanna touch, smell, feel, have fun with, see or only dream about. Yes, I want to dream… and play with silver clay and maybe better lens. And to read. I wanna try new, I wanna keep with old which is trusted and safe.

I just want…

It will never end. Learning. I wanna learn the language of Navajo, touch every marked rock in Sweden, I just want. And wanting is good.  I want old and new and this what in fact stands between times. Simple. I do not want to stop.

Stopping is dying.

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