Arty evolution

Artists change.

People change.

Artist are people, or maybe not fully, but still, often much more fragile much more vulnerable, often art comes out from depression and anxiety, touched with all those mental pushes like Asperger or autism… and those are minds which in fact often change. Or not. Or change suddenly and then come back…

But what buyers want?

Because come on, we got to eat and pay for brushes and paint. Or electricity… we mostly do not live in the woods, by the river where we can fish and eat grass or mushrooms. Plus in Danmark you can not just camp wherever you want.

Sooo…

We change.

We evolve.

Sometimes we stop.

Sometimes we destroy our pieces. But in fact most of us is… crazy enough to try live from it. When you combine with science, well, if you wanna buy Chanel, choose other studies or become a Youtuber.

Or Influencer.

Still… art changes and very often consumers hate those changes. Painting something what you do not see more in your inside, in your soul/heart/guts/whatever… this is a nightmare. My complicated mind can no more get it. So it stopped and pushed me back into photos which in fact were with me since my birth.

This happens when you are raised by artists and teachers.

You evolve.

You change like seasons.

You can come back and nope, you can not push, force anyone to like you. This is the truth. I bet the ripple does not have those problems. Oh you pretty one, with all those amber shades and spots of blue… so pretty.

Accept artists changing, sometimes it can be really freeing… and sometimes you can find something new. In old… new, what will make you fly. A picture which will show how easy you can understand yourself.

Life is about…

Remember, that none knows it what life is about. I mean really. Even those who are dead. They had that life, maybe if we accept traveling of souls and reincarnation, still, how many lives before being a god?

Still… life is short and to be honest you, just you, should be the one who fights for it and does everything to be… yeah, is the happiness still on? The highest dream? The biggest one? Really?

But maybe, especially around this time of year when so many speaks of consumptionism and celebrating time, humanity could just stop pissing me?

Yes!

Pissing me when I say that I do love gloomy days, I love winter and this time which should be quiet. Should be a time to reflect, sleep longer, rest, read, be with someone who you love, have more sex – if you are into it LOL – just slow down.

Look longer on the horizon.

Look longer on branches, last leaves… everything. Just step into this wet gloominess. Just accepting it. Or more like, stop pissing me with your stupid theories about abundance and ecology, and just only join nature!

Look at your garden, how it is still awesome, although everyone says plants are dead.

Look at the woodlands and look at the sea.

It is always…

… breathtaking.

Always.

Turn off

Turn off yourself and look at the sea.

It does not care how you look.

It does not care how much you weight.

It really is here for the fish, seaweeds and mysteries, legends and beings unknown. If you ask nicely, it will whisper you stories…

But are you ready for them?

Not all of them are… well, “nice” in the way people define it today.

Because nice, naughty, bad, good… when you look into those waves, everything is just… natural. Comes from water and comes there back…

Changes and never is the same.

Still… for me, someone with weird aberration in the brain, somehow neither the sound nor this constant changing theme is disturbing…

Because it is natural.

And yes, those are still reflections…

Nope, not the paintings. LOL Nor feathers.

Just the world of reflections, which changes with every ripple.

To tell a story…

About the abyss which is much more interesting than TV… trust me! Or do not… well, who needs trust, right? Check it. Be a scientist.

Photoshop me softly

I was watching a part of new Adobe Photoshop show… and it killed me. Really. Because to be honest, why to worry…

Why to lie down, get wet…

Why?

Truly.

If everything can be done in seconds by some program?

Why to worry. Why to work? What for walk miles and take the poses and… really, why to paint… why?

What for do anything?

Can a human being create something what will be big enough as a work of software engineer or a programmer… or… wait, what does my Husband do? LOL Yes, I am aware that computers, internet… this all stuff took over our lives.

Okay, maybe I am not a good example, but…

But I still will be the one who is on a ground, trying every angle to find perfection. To find something new, amazing, to surprise someone… myself.

Because yes Sheepydale it does look like a painting.

Smooth brushes dancing on blue canvases…

Why to think about taking something over the nature, choosing… why some of us can not be like me. Unable to suit into this rush?

Solitaires…

There is a place for all of us. Those which see inspiration in everything and those who prefer to be led by hand… who need a leader.

Someone who will tell them how and what to do to be found fancy and smart…

I may not understand how someone can need a specialist to tell them how to breath, live and poop, but this is me, stupid one on hard rocks trying to catch a wave which could be created by some graphic program in seconds.

But… still it hurts. Hurts when someone says, that a computer will do it quicker and better than a human being… why it hurts so much?

Why?

The abstractions 3

Well… to be honest, are those abstractions, or a little booklet about: how to play with your brush?

I mean really.

LOL

Because with those waves, smudges and moves, ripples and all this dancing…

You can not be sure.

Maybe…

But to be honest, look. This is such inspiration. For your hand and brush.

To deep and work slowly, but for a long time. One way and back…

And then we add more white…

And something to make someone smile!

And then suddenly… some orange surprise.

And again only white, red and blue…

And more blue, because it is so soft and overwhelming… and in fact can overtake your mind. So easily…

Too easily. LOL

The abstractions 2

And here they come…

Amazing. Bit more monochromatic.

Bit more different. Oh my, all those lines, colors so simple.

Grey and some blue, plus shades…

Simple, for every room.

Even a dungeon. LOL

Something, what will divide your thoughts, what will make you think that the world is not black and white… but more like blue and grey.

Or whiteish?

That everything can be described just by few words… but people forgotten them. Unfortunately. And they were so perfect…

So perfect.

Oh yes, and again we come to bit more fun, for those not depressed. Because my depressed soul loves that simple blue and grey.

Although, when it comes to all those swirly whirls… they are so cute.

I mean really.

And all those waves!

The abstractions

When it comes to abstracts, the sea rocks it.

I mean really.

Have you ever just sit by the sea, in a harbor, or where the faces of the land and cottages reflect… and watched it. Bit wavy or calm. Maybe with some seaweeds or so clear that resembling a two side mirror.

Okay, fields can sometimes do it too… but still.

The sea rocks it.

It looks like a painting. I mean really. A perfect painting. One and only. Worth millions dreams and million thoughts.

Or maybe even more?

So… why to paint them?

Why?

Maybe because we also wanna reflect ourselves there? Deepest hidden shades and shapes? Memories and ideas, dreams and thoughts…

This is why I love them.

For the rest I can take photos.

And sometimes…

I take them and I know…

I will never be as good and true as nature.

Never.

Grass me! 2

And deeper into the land everything changes.

Colors, shapes…

And how we see it in fact. Because standing on a stable ground you feel so safe. So… normal… until you meet an earthquake.

I know the one we had few years ago was a tiny, so tiny that for sure unnoticeable for those used to it…

But to be honest. For me it was it.

Everything…

I knew one… I do not wanna feel it again. Nope. Never!

But to be honest… can we be sure? The climate is changing. It is nothing new for this planet which is a constant evolution, but still…

Please, no…

So… it is so much different to look at this amazing autumnal sea from the ground.

Not getting wet.

But also, to be still here, smelling it…

Still…

Because to be honest we can not separate one from another.

We need both. Calmness of a still ground and always moving waters.

We need them…

Grass me!

Soooo… there is this moment.

And when I say “moment”, I really mean it.

It is such a short part of time, autumn, that you may miss it.

If you are by the sea.

By a magical sea like Baltic Sea.

Or maybe it my island which make them so special?

So colorful… for a moment.

Short one.

And of course you got to have light and waves and this blueness and…

Still not so cold weather.

To not freeze off your butt, you know…

Important thing, or tip even.

Dress up accordingly. LOL

But this grass, and the colors. Redness, green and parts of brown…

It is a moment and they are gone.

Like… shaved by waves and winds.

Grass which is okay with salty water and rocks.

In fact.. they loving it.

Only it… because closer to the ground it changes… again.

That part of the sea touching the land but not being in fact a part of both… neither the sea nor the land… maybe this is what makes them so special.

And short living too.

November?

Come on!

Tell me how it happened?

November? Are you kidding me? It was just 2018 and I felt so bad… and every month after vacation was pain…

Beginning of 2019 was also not good at all. Try to feel something, have those feelings, dreams, know that something BIG will happen…

But you are still yourself… I mean me, me not believing in myself. Me without self-confidence.

And now… I have a home… The Home. Awesome and cute. Of course there is a lot of work in front of us, but no rush, painting can wait!

It can, right?

But… I am still scared. Depression is a wild horse and happily dances around with anxiety, sooo… for sure I look like I am not grateful.

This is not true.

I am just… scared to be grateful.

Scared to be happy.

Have I ever been?

I do not remember this. Maybe as a kid…

Oh… but I wanted to tell you something about the autumnal sea… amazing, warm – in colors – sea… with breathtaking reflections and grass and seaweeds…

And…

Suddenly I figured out it is already fucking November!!!

Who stole my 2019!!!?

I mean really.

Come on.

Be brave enough and let me smash you!!!