Footprints

I saw them…

… and it is still winter here… footprints in the sand. In this amazing, a bit different from soft and puffy sand of Dueodde, heavily granulated pink sand. And yes, it is still sand, but a bit not smashed, only for those with thicker skin.

I saw them.

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Who could come out from the sea?

I mean really? Because there were no footprints leading to the water, only those coming from… Wet still, but there was nobody around. Only this silence, and peace. Only this waiting in the air.

Did I feel watched?

Yes. But not in a creepy way, no worries. And I was so amazed by this pink sand. So unfinished. Still with stones too big. Still not smooth, still ouchy if you decide to take your boots off. But this beach is still changing. Still getting smoother with every year. Still working on it, patiently. This beach has time to be perfect. And she is letting itself for it. Just wanting to be the best she can be… Smart one. Maybe we all should learn that we need time. Yes it is running away, passing by so quickly. I am still one leg in December!  Still heavily granulated. But… maybe this is my way of life? Maybe I do not have to be a smooth, light, milky sand, maybe I am one of those ouchy? LOL

PS. Remember there is still few paintings in my shop – and remember, you propose the price, do not care for this what is written http://gallerikobaltowawrona.dk/shop/ And if you wanna buy one of my photos – you can see them here Kobaltowa Wrona or on my IBornholm (Bornholm Different) page and blogs (150DKK paypal and you get regular size on your email) – just contact me via Facebook.

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Just have it

Have this time for yourself.

I mean really have it. It does not always mean alone time, it means have it only for yourself. As you like it – still unless you are a serial killer or something like that – have it and enlarge it. Yeah, I sound like those motivation trainers right now, right? But this is how it is… we listen too many people we try to make everyone happy, and suddenly, here we are, or maybe only me… in a sad place where nobody in fact does the same for us. Oh yes… now should come this all Christian another chick thing, but… I am a witch. As many before me. Not wiccan. No religion included. Just crazy, wild, free paganism. Me… telling you all to let go.

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Nope, will not sing that Elsa song, no way! But you can! LOL If it suits you. If it is a piece of you. Yup, others will look at you if you do it in public, but in fact… who cares?

I noticed people do things they inherited from the past, and struggling with it. Especially when it comes to religion. Especially, when you get free from it, suddenly you start to be so natural, that it makes you surprised, that nobody else does it. And free. You can even swim naked if you live on an Island. But not in every place, we have some norms. LOL I mean really! Maybe too much lakrids, but still…

Life is such pain for too many, and it really bothers me, that people prefer it, than to find this what makes them be piece, quiet, happiness… or at least less pain, maybe some joy? Why do we so love to be liked by others? Yes of course I also include the internet stuff. So many people, and in fact all the same. Scared to say the truth. Hiding the covers of the books they love behind those so popular. Eating healthy. Oh my, those are for me the funniest. Want piece of chicken, have it? Eat it! Do not Instagram it!

Why am I writing it… because I am so over sad people. Sad people who in fact know they want something else, but are scared of what Mamma say, religion, people who in fact are not their friends. Come on, find yourself, and stop eating that hated salad. Or maybe find your own Island. In fact it can be a room in a skyscraper. Still counts! But find it, and have it. Because this is your life. Stop betraying yourself.

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I sink into…

When I work, whatever I do… well, I sink into it. When I work with my studies, when I search for symbols, when I try to look for them, or when I can really touch the rocks and find them… I am all into it. There is nothing more. No sky, no grass, no soil and no me too. There are only symbols.

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When I paint, I sink in it.

This is all I do. My hands move, my body in some parts is so still. This is all I do. I do not wan to be disturbed. I need perfection. Same with photography. I do not get people who can talk and take photos. I need myself. Maybe music in my ears, and nothing more. I got to be focused. And often I even stop to breath… because you do not want to move this lovely water drop from this petal.

You do not want to…

And writing. My Husband says that I am like a machine. Eyes often closed, and only fingers dancing, hitting my keyboard. Only me and words. Thoughts jumping out from my head, creating stories.

Weird stories.

There are sounds around me, but they got to be familiar. Nothing new, nothing too loud, nothing too fancy. Just familiar sounds. Even if this is just a movie, I got to know it good enough to know when everyone dies… LOL

And how do you work?

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Storm is coming?

Why a question mark? Because we are stormy recently for a week or more even. Waves, rivers full of water mixed with sand. And this weird feeling inside of me. Fear and joy mixed together… because this is how wind plays with myself.

Nasty.

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I started “The Blue Sun”… huge painting only because if that crazy wind. Only because masses of air are dancing around me, hitting my roof, and walls… roof and walls of my cottage and my soul. Or whatever we got what makes us special. Do I believe in souls? Do I really?

Do not ask me about it, when it is so windy. So crazy windy. So strong, so scary… I paint the weirdest paintings and take the most frighting photos. Which are unrepeatable. Really. This Island can make everyone crazy from time to time. Everyone special and totally different than usual. Or maybe it is only me?

Is it? Don’t the weather play with you? How can you be sure? How can I be sure of anything with this wind inside and outside…

Geee… I am so crazy!!! LOL

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Love today

Okay.

I can not be an expert.

Same guy for over 20 years. Weird, crazy love. Of course not perfect, not roses petals on my path, no breakfasts to bed, no diamonds… wait, I hate diamonds and breakfasts, and I love my paths natural and roses… well, are not so important for me. Except herbal roses, these are amazing.

Oh my, that smell…

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For me love is like my boots. One totally wet, one dry. They are together, can not live without each other, but still they are different. This is how we are, me and my Husband, different. He prefers this, i that. He likes meat, me can not stand it. He is a guy, I am totally not…

But today, in those present times love is… different. If I were to look for, I would be unaware how to start. What to do? Go to a bar? Oh my, I live on a small Island, but still it is Danmark, here people just go to bed. Someone can just tell you, after few phrases and maybe a drink – optional – let’s go to bed. Let’s fuck. And they call it love. And they have kids. People often just have sex and call it making love. That is just… stupid, fake, this is not a definition of… or maybe I am only ancient? Maybe? Here women have kids with different men and marry late with someone else. Just because staying alone for the all mighty old time just sucks, right? Fucking whatever whenever is normal. Trying to keep a relationship is stupid. Unnatural. Suddenly we are not monogamist, suddenly… everything is a product, not just… you know, love.

Love for me is like shoes.

You need a pair. Just a pair. They may be different, but they still are shoes. Sounds weird, right? Or maybe this is only me, too jealous to accept third shoe or forth? Or me only old fashioned, stopping civilization… me. Me not getting it that starting sex from ass – yes, I am not sorry for this word, I could use anus, but, what for? – is modern. One shoe is wet one dry, but they are together. They are worn by two legs, not the same, one right one let and i fact, those legs sometimes wanna wear different socks, but they compromise. Or not, and decide to be crazy!

Love…

Me. I would be lost in this modern world without my love… totally! And finding love now, that would be impossible for me.

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Bored…

Bored – “feeling unhappy because something is not interesting or because you have nothing to do:
It was a cold, wet day and the children were bored.
He was getting bored with/of doing the same thing every day.

More examples

I was so bored that I slept through the second half of the film.
I enjoyed my course at first, but after a time I got bored with it.
He sensed (that) his guests were bored, although they were listening politely.
He grew bored of the countryside.
The novelty of these toys soon wore off and the children became bored with them.

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1. There is nothing wrong in being bored, if you do not harm anyone to make yourself more interesting and not bored – like becoming a serial killer. I mean really. Nothing wrong with being bored, because maybe… I mean MAYBE, it means that you are thinking really hard about your next step?

2. Boring life – I hear very often, and you know what? Boring is not bad, not bad at all!!! Boring life means a safe, lovely, peaceful one! Boring life means nothing wrong and painful happening… sooo, yeah i like my boring life.

3. Feeling bored… Sorry, I do not know that feeling. There is always something to do, something to change, something to create, to see, to make research about, to just discover, to just be and… write. Boring, yes, you can see myself as a boring person, but bored, nope. Sorry, not bored at all!!! I just do not get it how people can be bored. Overwhelmed with all that stuff okay, but bored? How? As a kid I did not have fancy toys or Ipads. I had a pile of sand, and pieces of wooden stocks, which in fact where magical beings who had many adventures. And fancy funerals… yeah, I know, but it leads to an archaeologist, me/archaeologist. LOL I liked making their deaths fancy. I had grass. Do you know that some kinds of grass have long, thin roots, which can make awesome hair. Oh I loved playing with them, when coming back from school. For few years I had to walk miles to school and back, so I had a lot of time to play with grass… they helped me to feel safer. But also, they taught me to be afraid of human beings.

Life… living or dead, you can not be bored!

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Carnivale!!!

Whatever drives your goat… ekhm, LOL, such crazy saying, but when it comes to me “carnivale” does not exist. No parties no dresses, no drinks… I am boring, told ya. But still, it is very interesting than in those so called modern, civilized days, where science rules, people still have carnival and lent?

I mean really?

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But what do you know about carnival in fact? Except fun, boobs and booze? Wanna know more, here is the link!!!

“The exact origin of the name “Carnival” is disputed, but some state that the word comes from the Late Latin expression carne vale, which means “farewell to meat,” signifying that those were the last days when one could eat meat before the fasting of Lent. The word carne may also be translated as flesh, so suggesting carne vale as “a farewell to the flesh,” a phrase actually embraced by certain Carnival celebrants who encourage letting go of your former self and embracing the carefree nature of the festival.”

So vegans? How is your fun? LOL

For me, boring, playing in the woods old being, carnival does not exist. I do not go out to the parities or restaurants, I do not dance, except all those crazy moves which I do when I do them… and singing, I do it whenever I can, and whenever nobody is listening. I am so generous and kind! Yup, perfect me!!! Lent is when cash is low or does not exist. Fun is when I feel it, none can just tell me: you must… not anymore. If you wanna tell me this, I will hide! And I may scream… and believe me I scream loud!

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Valentine’s Day

… oh yes.

This day.

The most hated and loved in one moment. I do not get it. Pagans yell, that it is stupid, and pure commercialism, atheists, just smile more when see hearts or do not mind at all. And the rest of the world? Christians do not know what to do with it and… I remember time when it did not exists at all.

Do you know how it started? Here… read some. Naughty Romans, right? LOL

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But there is more… The Legend.

The legend says there was, around third century in a Roman Empire, a doctor – trained, and a bishop in one person, called Valentine. He had enough guts to say NO to the Emperor Claudius II Gothicus, and blessed marriages of young legionnaires. See the EM thought unmarried soldiers are better, so no one between age 18-37 could get married. I get him, really, but I also get love and the bishops way of thinking. Of course for this lack of subordination he was thrown into prison, where… LOL he fell in love with the blind daughter of his guard. See, there goes better… legend says, that his love, of course under the influence of bishop’s love… regained sight!!! YAY!!!

Of course the EM heard about it and decided to end it forever, so… he ordered to kill Valentine. Legend says, that a day before the execution Valentine wrote a letter to his not blind anymore beloved, and signed it: “From your Valentine”.

The execution was performed on February 14, 269.

Sooo… yeah, Beltane is better and Kupała’s Night is better, or maybe just different? See, we talk so much about religions, we make borders, still in fact maybe really all we need is love, chocolate, some flowers and someone who tells us, that we are precious and one and only. You can do whatever you want. Hate it, love it… I was on an awesome walk, and got a lovely card. Is it because of this day? Nope, I do it often. But why not, I can say I did it because of the 14th!!!

Just smile people. There is no one who can force you to buy a rose, no one to tide you up and stuff with chocolates… oh that could be fun though, Lindor… yummy. Okay, I am back, no one can force you to buy diamonds – I hate diamonds, prefer flint and lapis lazuli and crystals. You do not have to even celebrate this day as someone tells you! You can do nothing. Totally…

Or just kiss someone you love, even it is you. LOL

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The Moon

Yup, that huge one.

Yuck!!! I know they say that ladies are moon people. But you know what… it pisses me off! Sorry, but this is the truth. I feel good only, when it is gone, or really thin. My magic works the best when the sky is full of stars, and no moon. And few telescopes of little green men watching us, because the Earthians are the best TV ever!!! LOL

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Still… for the first time I really saw it. The moon touching the sea, in fact it looked like it was melting into my sea. Making the waves so weird. Not silver, not black either, more like “dead-milky-scary”. It was in one moment fascinating and also so frighting. So enormously terrible and frightful. So unnormal. Unreal. But also beautiful. I was shaking – frosty winds – but could not move. Okay finally the wind just put me back to the car… but still, then was Jupiter watching me all my way back and now…

Do not mind me wrong, I do feel watched!

Still, coming back to moon… why I do not feel it’s lady? His lady? Why I do not dance around stones when it blows… why I somehow do not feel the sun either. Am I really daughter of stormy winds and heavy snestorms?

Sounds good. Sounds so me!!!

PS. Yup this is it. That light, no photoshop. And nope I did not turn it to make it black and white only.

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Grey’s thingy…

Oh my, and now I am in this moment when I read this title and just laugh, but… well, it is perfect, so… The Grey’s thingy… Just please explain me, why and how? And what the heck is with this world, or more like ladies only.

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Of course I am talking about that movie and books. You know of that guy liking to hit girls and calling it sex? Or even love? Adverts are attacking me from every page saying: this is a movie perfect for Valentine’s Day. And I am like WHAAAAAAAAAAAT?

Okay, we got to be honest… St. Valentine. The one who was all about courtly love. Chivalry, knights and all that stuff, usually no sex at all. Now is glorify by BDSM? Where is the love? Oh well, there was such song… where are ladies all into brave guys ready to help puppies, and being just true and honest?

Where?

I watched the world in madness about the books by this author. I was amazed how so poorly written book – I was also informed, that it is much better in polish translation, because polish is a very rich language – about a stupid, dumb girl, and weird guy needing psychiatric help, can be so popular. I mean really! There is even no good sex in it. Yes, to write it I heard the first book. Not read it, I listened to it. Decided not to damage my eyes for that… and yuck! Do you know, that the actress reading this in fact in one moment said: what the fuck have I just read?

PS. Are nowadays ladies protesting in the mornings against some laws, and then during late evenings dreaming about such men? If so… there is something wrong with us. Totally!!! Very wrong.

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