Roots

Do you know yours?

Is it still important?

To know if you look like your grand grandmother, or maybe to have thoughts and dreams like her. To have her smile, or grandpas eyes. It sounds really spooky when you think about it deeper. To have grandpas eyes. You know. HIS EYES. Like Igors from Terry Pratchett books. LOL THE SAME!!!

Perfect thought for Halloween!!! LOL

Still… how is it with you.

How it is with your grandparents? Do you know them, who they were, whose were they parents, and then… their parents, sisters and brothers? Can you create a family tree, or can you remember? Like ages ago, when people cold describe who his grand grand grand parents were and uncles, aunts and cousins… Nowadays it seems to be even inappropriate to ask about family.

At least I feel so.

Sooo… do you smile like your grandma?

Have grandpas pimples?

Or maybe like grand grandma you are a writer, painter, artist? You love cucumbers or hate them, or maybe you have obsession around apples and cooking?

Because I am missing a half of myself not knowing who my father was… and it is painful. This is how you discover that families are important, but also huge pain in the ass!!! LOL But you do not have to live too close to them, to love them…

… nope.

Times are different

Oh so often people say it, but you know what… in my sweet “unimportan” opinion… it is not true. Not at all. We just ONLY have different toys and decide to do things differently, to just show off, and then come back to old stuff.

Every generation wants to be so modern, so okay, and of course leave something behind but the truth is, except few innovations: the wheel, writing, etc. nothing fun has happened. Sorry. A phone?

Oh please!

Writing and reading… masterpiece, but… who now reads and writes? Truly? When, last time, have you read the WHOLE article, book, post? TLDR? Oh how often I see it. Maybe you need pictograms? Drawing of a human washing dishes will be enough? Enough to say, oh poor woman, why is she doing it, being a slave of a man…

Oh my…

Nowadays whatever you do you will be judged. Know this meme about a pair and a donkey? Oh yes… me too!!! So what? How are your toys? Are you still obsessed by them? Or can you go with me to the beach and spend hours checking stones and driftwood… for free? Like in stone age?

Sooo? LOL Because times did not change, only dates are different, toilets – only for some people, I still do it in the woods…

Here comes the striptease!!!

Sooo… yeah. Of course I am aware of something called click bait. Of course. But it is not one, I made one. I mean not a click bait, a striptease!!!

Number one… to make it clear, I am old enough to know my body is not perfect, and it has marks, and my exercises will not change it, and… really looking at me is not a wonderful experience, so I just assume nobody is doing it. None is looking at me, because there is nothing interesting there…

But…

Yeah, it was all again about standing stones. I love them, even with this grey weather, I need them, I made sacrifices, I do crazy dances – dressed, and I go deep into the woods, and come back with unwanted passengers. Very big with millions legs – okay I am exaggerating, but still… They were everywhere under my blouse and shirt and in my bra, so what could I do? I stated to undress. Got to free those guys, right? Do the correct thing. Be ecological!!!

Luckily for me, undressing on a wooden path, there was none in sight, but you can never be sure. I bet I heard laughing, and other weird noises!!! LOL

Remember about my crazy YouTube LOL

PS. Remember all photos are for sale, those on Facebook IBornholm and Kobaltowa Wrona too 🙂 Paypal (150DKK), mail and you can print is as you want 🙂 Whatever size you want. So please… buy them, do not steal them. Bigger size is better LOL And I am a poor artist. Crazy poor… And of course I am not talking about photos of my face. You are not so crazy to want it, right? LOL

And if you can not, at least please click on those commercials, that is money for me. For more writing, creating, and mostly for my research about Bronze Age symbolism of a hjulkors. Cross in a circle… LOL I promised myself that I will not do it, but now I am struggling, really. And I do not have sponsors I do not promote anyone because they paid me for it. If I like it, if I believe in it, if it is truth, I write about it, that is all. Nobody pays me for it.

Silence

There is so many kinds of silence. There is this one before… and after. There is this one which appears when everything is so loud….

Silence before a storm.

Natural and wavy or this one, more human…

Silence.

Are you able to deal with silence?

No wind, no birds, no people… no sounds, no TV, music, computers. No fridge talking weirdly – yea, mine talks, I have no idea in which language… maybe fridges got their own languages? Maybe? She is old and rusty, but still working. So she talks and sings, and even creates poems.

My Island creates this special silence before windy day and night, before big waves coming. This is the silence which you can physically feel. Which aches. Which in fact is so painful for your mind. It is like… everything was off and suddenly you hear you heart beating, blood in your veins Danica, and you start to wonder that it all can stop, and…

Yeah, a bit horror movie, right?

Soo… what is silence for you? Because for me… it is really complicated. And I am okay with it. LOL

Sleeping…

I love to sleep. I am crazy about cushions, blankets and all that stuff. I love dreaming, living i this other world, which I try to change, but of course my brain always wins and make them weird, funny, scary or just too strong…

Still… recently I had problems with sleeping, so now I am trying something new. Not staying up late, no reading, and then waking up around 10a.m. I go to bed just around 11p.m. I go there and… surprisingly, for most of times, falling asleep and…

… getting up really early around 6-7a.m. Not that I want to. Not that if not waken up, I would be doing it.

Of course I was hoping it will change my owl side. But nope. I do not work more. I sit down and look outside. I am of course productive in the beginning, but still, I should work more. Finally should have more time, but nope!!!

How is it possible?

Time still wins.

Runs like crazy and I am not a cowboy to catch it with my lasso.

It looks like a painting…

Oh yes, I hear it all the time.

Somehow okay and arty is only taking photos black and white or humans posing. I mean really? What has happened to: art is free?!!! Everyone is different so creates different stuff. And in fact how often do you see same techniques, same styles, truly used same tutorials and people calling it innovative or new and fresh?

One and only?

Sooo…

Oh no…

I was not fresh and clean lying down in semi smelly seaweeds – almost fresh – trying to catch the reflections. Nope. Of course I came back home wet, because somehow… do you also have it, that when by the sea, on a beach or rocks, waves come to you. Silently, but then suddenly they grow and, well, hug you!!!

Wet hug is amazing when you are naked and prepared… dressed in a suit or just things you can got wet in… but when it is windy cold, well, I still like it, but coming back home with wet ass is painful a bit.

LOL

Still… so I was in those seaweeds, because fresh ones have those vibrant colors, and the sky reflecting in a sea water seems to be more special, than this usual sky above our heads, and…

I was not bothered by time.

The only thing which count was the light. Nothing else. And I figured it out… this is how I can spend hours, days and years. I mean really. I forget about everything while taking photos. Only they count.

Shapes and structures, colors, shades and ripples.

Nope… I am defo not a true photographer, because I hate taking photos of people. Only my Husband should be there. If I want him there. And if he agrees. Of course he usually does. Yeah. Or more like often, still… I take photos. I am different.

Because I take photopaintings!!!

Yes, my photos look like paintings because my camera is also my brush, and recently painting is a bit not for me. I have no place to put canvas, to splash paint. I ca not just cover the carpet with paint. Cleaning it remove nails from my fingers! I struggle, because I want to paint, but still, again then there is this cleaning, tiny space… I get nervous, frustrated… anxiety hit me, and canvas stay white.

But I hope it will change.

Somehow.

PS. Remember all my photos from blogs and Facebook pages are for sale (150DKK, paypal, mail)!!! LOL I do not print them and send them printed because of the high postage. It is killing me. Yes, PostNord is killing me!!! Hear it PotNord!!! You have my blood on your… stamps!!! I mean really and truly!!!

Gods for rent

Imagine yourself such a stall.

Not so big, made from a nice, bright stone, with lovely, sculptured shelves and all this glitter. And of course whispers, soothing music…

Imagine even a shop maybe…

With gods.

For rent, or to buy, cheap and expensive ones; forever, or maybe only for a month. Would you decide for a one to always keep your socks in pairs or is it too weird for you? Do you see gods as huge, unnatural beings, forgetting, that in every mythology they created humans, so… they could not be so unhuman.

Nope…

So… imagine a stall.

Would you decide for one? Or maybe you would never exchange yours? Are you having a god? One and only? Or is it too personal? Is it offending when I call you believes mythology? Or maybe you in fact do not care…

No worries, I am no preparing a fucking crusade. I am only writing another story. A novel maybe. With gods, magic and regular people.

With you all.

About you all.

And your gods. There is in fact so many of them. Those more famous, those less famous, those forgotten, those sleeping, those still waiting to be noticed, those loud and those so silent. Those able, and those who are only pulling your leg.

So many…

And when you…

What are you thinking about when you fall asleep?

Are you creating, like me, tiny stories from time to time. Weird stories about places unknown and people not existing. Or maybe only about those existing because for dreaming none can punish you, you know…

… at least for now!

Stories which grow with time creating another universes, and picking up veils of parallel ones. Where you are a queen, a king, slaughter or just a dwarf, lady or maybe just an actress. Famous, with complicated life or maybe just simple…

Last night I was watching the sky on the North Pole.

Yeah… all those colors, all those songs of aurora borealis.

Because I… well, usually am only thinking if I got it right. You know, wrote down all those mumbling thoughts in my head, on that white sheet of paper in this total darkness… and if I will be able to read them in the morning.

My handwriting is awful.

Trust me!!!

It does not stop me from writing, but still…

The sea

It is dark.

Finally my Island has this amazing darkness back and present. Which I missed so much! Which I so need and love, although I also love fairy-lights and candles so… it is a complicated relationship.

The Mighty Night… Darkness here and on place.

I lie down and…

I can hear it.

The sea.

See… it is soooo addicting.

When it is quiet, we got crazy. When waves are here, winds and all those sounds, it is so much better. So much more normal. The silence – in nature – is for me so unnatural. But what the heck do I know about nature. Only this, that when it gets quiet i the woods, you know a huge monster is coming, so…

The sea.

Which now looks like… autumn in liquid.

You just get inspired from it so easily… you sunk into those colors and sounds. Into this wet madness full of amazing seaweeds and sea grass and however it is called… I just sit here, wet my ass, do not care, and think that I can not live without it. It is for me physically and mentally impossible to live without the sea.

Falling asleep without this sound.

Not seeing it everyday.

Not knowing, feeling, it is so close.

Hobby or work?

Oh my, tell me honestly how often do you hear this question? When on a question: what do you do for living is… you answer: I am an artist. Truly, when you answer that you are an archaeologist, they will ask you about dinos, what pisses me off, Indiana Jones – who I love, or just nod sadly saying: I dreamed about when I was a kid, then I grew up… and they give you that look.

Oh yes, I didn’t.

Proud of it!!!

Sooo… hobby or work?

Truth is, the difference should be one: the money. If you got paid it is work, but truly if it is a hobby do you feel less tired of sculpting or thinking, or brushing, or taking photos in a lotus position? Nope. So what makes it hobby? That you do it only for yourself? But art is always a part of you… sooo? You can not erase yourself from it.

It is impossible! It is always personal. Even if they ask you to paint them a blue pelican with a Greek goddess jumping from his brain…

Truly, it is hard.

Hard to say: I am an artist, and not to hear in response: okay but what you do for living, payed for, normal, usual? Artists: dreamers, idealistic usually, crazy often, in fact always looking for more, something different, trying to change ways of thinking, just being different, often living alone… in strange places.

But only often.

If I sold nothing this week, was it only hobby?

And tomorrow it will be work? But I am so lousy in selling! I wanna keep my art for myself, or give it for free, to make people less judging.

Or…

So…. Hobby or work? When you finish one of artistic schools, for sure work, right? But what if… what if not? I mean really. What if you decide to make it only a hobby and then open a nail salon? Or become a hairdresser or a part of Bob the Builder company?

How do you feel?

The Mighty Secret Truth is… it’s up to you.

If you say it is only a hobby, it is one, if work… you are just waiting to be discovered and bought by some Kardashians. I bet that could help really i this weird world, where they are called… art!!!